Why can't I rest in Christ's sufficiency?

I listened to a great sermon this morning, the second in series that Shawn Slate, the UVa ruf pastor, is doing on Colossians this Fall. I must confess that, though I've really enjoyed and gotten a lot out of many talks that Shawn has given in the past, I only began listening to this latest series after a great recommendation from my friend Josiah. To be honest, I had been really hesitant to begin this series, and I couldn't tell you why, exactly. But I'm grateful to God for using to Josiah to pique my interest, for the message is something that I've needed to hear for quite some time. And not just hear. Meditate on. Rest in.

The funny part is that my team has even been doing a study on this book and Paul's timeless appeal to the church in Colosse to trust in Christ's sufficiency instead of their own had all but been lost on me during my previous studies. And, you know, I think it was lost on me because I wanted it to be. What, you say? How could that be? I know. I'm beginning to see more and more how reluctant my heart is to let go of its autonomy. Everyday, I have a myriad of choices, some little, some big. But regardless of size, each decision I make points beyond itself to a deeper reality of where my trust really lies. And sadly, most all of my decisions reflect an overt refusal to accept Christ as my King. I hate that about myself. But it is so true. I am so fake, so false, so full of sin. So unable to do anything on my own, except sin. But, you know what? The fact that I hate my sinful nature is something to rejoice in, for it's an unmistakable sign that God is working in me! Praise be to Him who is faithful to the unfaithful!

Wait, so maybe I am beginning to trust in His sufficiency, after all! Sure, the process is slow, ever so slow, and no doubt, God will be patiently teaching my heart this lesson for the rest of my life, but a quote from Slate's sermon gives me hope like I've never had before. Eugene Peterson once said,

"We like to think that spirituality is all about us, that it's about us trying to figure out how we can become more spiritual, that it's about us trying to figure out how we can read our Bibles better, that it's about us trying to figure out how we can pray better, that it's about us trying to figure out how we can be better, that it's about us trying to figure out how we can help people better and solve their problems better, that it's all about us. And the problem is that, as we think about spirituality, what we really want is to be the main character of our spiritual biography. We want to be the main character in our own spiritual story. That's what we want. And that is a detriment to true spirituality. Because true spirituality is found when you start thinking about yourself less and you start thinking about God more...Spirituality begins when you get so tired and fed up with yourself that you go on to something better. You go on to Jesus."

May God grant each of us this. And He will if we ask for it!

Love,

Tim

p.s. my longer update coming soon, les lo prometo...